Saturday 11 August 2012

Sunshine on a rainy day - or is that rainshine on a sunny day

I'm in one of those moods today.

I can't figure out why. I can't even figure out what.

Maybe it's just the weather. It's what we would describe as "a typical Melbourne day". One minute, the sun is up. The next minute it's cloudy. The next minute, the sun is up again. The next minute, it's pouring.

I think I'm feeling a bit like that today. One minute, I'm feeling that I'm really motivated and moving and on top of things. The next minute, not so much.

It's been a bit like that all week. Partly it's my head. One minute, I have a headache. The next minute, it's clear. And so on. I'm getting a bit sick of it. Can my head just make its mind up. Be sore, and then I can take some tablets and have a nap, or be fine, and then I can go outside and dance around in the street (assuming the rain lets up).

Work has been a bit like that too. I have a bunch of pending deadlines. One minute, I think I'm fine and I'll meet them all, no problem. The next minute, I'm suddenly not so confident. Then, I suddenly realise that I have nothing to worry about and it'll be fine. But then I tell myself that maybe I'll meet the deadlines but the quality of the work will not be so great. Honestly, I tell you it's hard work being me.

I like to watch people. I guess that's a typical hallmark of any writer. Everybody seems so clear and confident and sure of what they're doing. I know, in most cases it's probably just a bluff, but gosh some people are good at it. I wish I could at least figure out how to pretend that I had some idea about what I was doing.

Gee, this has been a bit of a down post, hasn't it. Here's some good stuff to finish it off. I got some great feedback from a beta reader who had a look through Scribbling (the sequel to Doodling, which is hopefully not too far away from release now). Also made substantial progress on my other WIP - the YA/MG one I talked about in my last post. So what the hell am I complaining about?

Have a great week. Hope the sun breaks through the clouds for you. And if it doesn't, break it through yourself.

2 comments:

  1. I have always resented the fact that I’ve been a slave to my moods all my life. The more I read about it the more annoyed I get. I live a fairly regimented life. At least I aim to. I expect to get up at a certain time and begin work with a clear head at a certain time and work for as long as I expect to be able to and yet that so rarely happens. And there is no logic to any of it. Some days I can work; some days I can’t. I’m resigned to it now but I don’t like it. I feel I’m always working around my limitations. Some limitations I’ve got used to—I’ve worn glasses virtually my whole life and just accept that I’m short-sighted—and that’s fine as long as I can find a workaround. Moods I can’t get a handle on. If my back is sore I put on a back support and get on with it but when I get up in the doldrums what can I do to support myself while I get on with life? I give my face a good wash, eat, drink some real coffee (as opposed to the decaffeinated crap I usually drink), don’t listen to dreary music and try and get on with it. There’s always something I can do. If I can’t write I can find some grunt work that needs doing. But it really does bother me that I’m not fresh-faced and fighting fit every day.

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    Replies
    1. Hi Jim,

      I guess it's the everyday stuff we all deal with.

      Hope your week is a good one.

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