Saturday, 4 August 2012

The Writer Olympics is on

I suspect not too many people are going to read this post and I suppose I don't blame them. After all, the Olympics are currently on. Who would be sitting to read a humble little blog when they could be sitting in front of their telly, watching people running and jumping and throwing things, and all the other fun stuff they do at the Olympics?

In some ways, it seems a bit unfair. Why should the Olympics just be about running and jumping and throwing stuff. What about all the other valuable skills out there? And when I say "valuable skills", I'm talking in particular about what I regard as the most valuable skills in the world: writing skills.

So here's my solution. If the main Olympics doesn't think writing skills are important enough to include, we should just start our own Olympics - the Writer Olympics. 

Just think how amazing and exciting the Writer Olympics could be. Think of some of the fantastic events we could have. For a start, we writers are pretty good at twisting, whether it's a twist in a plot, or twisting the truth. The battle to see who can do the biggest and boldest twist should be something to see.

Then, of course, there's the wrestle between the plotters and the pantsers. This one should be a really epic event. I'd hate to be in the middle when these two great sides come up against each other.

A big part of the Olympics is the throwing events. We writers would have plenty of things we could throw. We could have a contest to see who can throw out the most ludicrous simile. This would be a bit I guess that's one event I won't be competing in.

Of course, the Olympics isn't the Olympics without the running events. Both speed and endurance are key events. The 100 word flash sprint should be a classic. And the marathon should also be epic. After all, who doesn't love a marathon writing session.

So there you have it. The Writer Olympics. I reckon I've barely scratched the surface in terms of what it could involve. I'd love to hear ideas from other people. And I reckon, I've left out potentially the best bit of all. The great writer's marketing bandwagon relay. Then again, maybe that's the subject for another post.